YOU need to get the information you need to move forward
Also, get used to the idea of Matthew McConaughey as a motivational speaker
In today’s letter (the first one), we’re going to explore personal accountability for getting the information you need to move forward from Eric Thomas’s Secret to Success Podcast. Then we’re going to talk about Matthew McConaughey’s rise as a motivational speaker, and yes we’re going to try to get used to it together.
Happy Friday
Today, Friday April 21, was a personal day for me, so I had the opportunity to get this Substack jumpstarted. It was an amazing Los Angeles day, the kind that convinces you that it’s ok to spend a stupid amount of money on real estate. It was maybe the warmest we’ve had this year.
I had to go to Santa Monica, so I drove along the coast from the South Bay, enjoying the smell of the ocean breeze. Later, as I was heading home on the (decidedly less scenic) 405, I was remembering a recent Ed Mylett podcast with Sam Acho. Ed was talking about how important it was for him as a parent to pour as much as he could into his kids. He would work hard to affirm them for being creative, charming, or whatever. Spontaneously.
It’s something I want to work on this weekend myself. I used to be better about it, but my career has been distracting. Pouring into others takes energy and deliberate practice. Usually we’re just reactive.
Even if it takes energy, doing this is particularly important for you in your own parenting, particularly if you are like my clients—going through a difficult family transition. There’s nothing more rewarding to me than spontaneously giving someone a gift like that to take me out of my own sadness. Especially as a parent. Should work for you too. Do it today.
About this letter
In this letter, I intend to bring you the latest motivational content from the internet so that you can apply it to your personal life. Most of my clients are going through some very challenging personal growth experiences (sometimes involuntarily), so I hope this letter will bring you some inspiration, motivation, or just peace.
Today in Tomorrow
In this first letter, I’ve got two to recent updates from the world of motivation to share with you.
Go Get That Bread (April 20, 2023) - Secret to Success Podcast
The guys on the S2S podcast are always entertaining. You’ve got CJ Quinney, Eric Thomas (“ET”), and Karl Philips. If you have never listened to the podcast, do it. The guys’ banter is beyond enviable. In fact, if you’re feeling lonely or down on yourself, just turn it on—you’ll feel like you’re right there in the conversation. I know I do. That alone is worth a listen.
In the most recent episode, Go Get That Bread (No. 381), the guys covered a lot of random topics quickly as they often do. Their episodes are long, so just let yourself float away with them. Their banter his a high-cholesterol, warm feel to them, which you might need right now.
I needed it, so I put on the AirPod Maxes. Was particularly entertained by their discussion of each other’s height. I’ve met Eric Thomas in person at one of his events in San Diego, so I knew he was approximately my size. But when I met him, he was in the star of the show, so he seemed larger than life. I’m glad he reminded me on this episode that he’s 5’ 10” — WITH Jordans on! I was even more grateful when added, “I know a lot of guys who are 6’ 8” who haven’t done nothin with their lives,” or something like that. Height is overrated :-)
Turning to motivation, this particular episode was heavy on financial success, which their shows often are. But still, the routes they chart to financial success are more about the inner mental game than specific financial moves, so what they tell you can be applied to your personal life.
For example, ET says, “not knowing is never an excuse for not finding out” (36:15) what you can do with your life. What he was talking about is that too many people make excuses for their lack of success because they don’t know what to do. So he’s shifting accountability back to you.
I think that message might resonate with you if you’re going through a family transition. Break ups are deeply ambiguous, complex, frustrating, painful, and confusing. Much information is needed. It’s easier to blame your ex than take responsibility for your future. Nevertheless, the future is your responsibility.
This is your life and, as ET said, “you don’t get to do it over.”
As I thought more about it, lacking information is often a serious problem for people in the same place you’re in, so you I agree that you need to own it.
Before they talked to me, many of my clients didn’t know what their options were, so they were stuck in fear. Often for years.
For example, before they talked to a lawyer, many of my clients didn’t know they might be able get their ex to pay attorney fees, or that they can get the financial support they need really early in the case. They feel trapped because they believe they can’t afford to move out. Alternatively, they don’t know they can ask to have the spouse removed by the judge.
That lack of knowledge fueled their fears, and kept themselves trapped. Once they know they have options, now we can shift back to making the values based decision.
Matthew McConaughey, Motivational Speaker—Get Used to Saying It
McConaughey is on the move. The former RomCom and, later, dramatic actor is recreating himself as a kind of life guru/motivational speaker. He was on Ed Mylett and Lewis Howes’s School of Greatness. I know he’s had a few bestsellers but I’m still getting used to this.
Personally, I purchased and often re-watch his version of The Lincoln Lawyer (not the new one with that wooden actor), and for quite a bit of my life I wanted to be a lot like him.
So I’m skeptical about his new persona myself, but I love hearing him talk. I wish I had a little of that Texas drawl myself. But there might be something to it. For those outside of Hollywood, I don’t think they really appreciate how much mental work one has to do to be a great actor, so I’m open to letting him show up in my life that way.
I registered for Monday’s (April 24) Art of Livin’ event here. They claim two million others did too, so we’ll be in good company. In fact, this afternoon I got an email from “Team McConaughey” reminding me about Monday’s event. I know how you feel. I’m still getting used to it too.
Even Tony Robbins sent me an email with the invitation to his event. My icon.
Let’s see where this goes.
Get in Touch With Me
I’m an attorney in the Los Angeles area. I work with clients in family law matters, like divorce, custody disputes, or post-judgment matters.
That said, I work differently from many attorneys, in that I focus heavily on supporting you through all aspects of it: the legal, financial, and emotional transitions. I help you move out of the past and into the future.
If you are in California, I’m happy to schedule a free initial consultation with you to help you chart a path forward.
If you are outside of California, we can still talk, but I can’t give you legal advice (nor would you want me to as all family law is state-specific).